Well, let's see...the first five words seem to have gone ok. So did the next nine. Ok.So what are we testing? I'm learning to type without actually having hands & fingers that really work and have sensation in them.
The good news is that apparently, I CAN type, albeit slowly and with an astronomical error rate, far above my norm. But the fact that I can at all is very good news. The bad news is, well, all of the above.
I don't have the foggiest idea what's going on with my body this time. Normal activities like using silverware, typing or writing, like, say, filling in a zillion Social Security forms seem to have turned my hands and fingers totally ... weird. They feel swollen, but they aren't. They feel heavier and denser than they really are, as if I can't bend them, even though I can, I just can't really feel that I can. They tingle sometimes and feel dead on the surface other times. There is deep, throbbing, dull shooting pain going up my arms to the elbow and sometimes my shoulders.
It's exceptionally hard to explain! (and I'm the one who's feeling it...) It's totally bizarre! Oh, now my hands shake when I try to hold them still. Cool!
Maybe I'll have to keep that appointment with the neurologist in August afterall, won't I? I was planning to cancel it, because if he's anything personality-wise like his office staff, then I hate him already. We shall see.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, I can't knit, obviously, and I can't do anything else crafty-like. Typing is...interesting...and it'll be very interesting to see what effect all this typing has on me an hour or a day after I'm done.
So, that was the experiment, to see what my fingers and hands were capable of; and to see if I can do the mental part of the typing, making the fingers go to the right key.
But now I'm seeing part of Farrah's documentary, kind of by accident, so that's completely taken all my attention. It's near impossible for me to watch and it's totally impossible for me to look away...
2 comments:
Hey Steph, Reyna loves your useless information. Her comment on the iguana suicide issue is "If you looked like an iguana and everyone ran screaming from you, wouldn't you want to off yourself ?" She is nine and she scares me, kinda reminds me of you at nine.
I am also somewhat consumed with my hand but since I had 36 stitches I know where my trouble comes from. I will have 12 hours of pain while nerves re-connect and then nothing for hours. I now have what they think is arthritis in a finger from being immobilized for weeks after the injury but the finger that I already knew had arthritis is fine now(?)
The cool thing is that I have a perfect Christian fish scar on my palm, maybe that will get me a free pass from someone someday.
Here we are at opposite ends of the same state, under the same moon, both staring in amazement at out malfunctioning hands, we must be related.
Love, Auntie
Yeah...keep the appointment with the neurologist. I don't care if he is the king asshole of the world, go see him and find out what is going on.
Don't make me nag! :P
I might even suggest calling, telling them that things are worse and seeing if you can get in earlier. Maybe Andy or one of your docs at the center can influence them to squeeze you in.
And is there anyone who can do some of the writing for you on some of these forms? As long as you sign them, I don't think they care who fills in the information.
Good luck, sweetpea. This still sucks.
Love you
Mom
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