I have quite a conundrum, and I need to solicit input from my panel of experts. (That would be you.)I also have some other catching up to do, so let's do that first.
Ok, first off, it really sucks to have spring fever, brought on by several gorgeous, temperate days in a row, which makes me want to garden something CRAZY, but I can't!!! I can't go out and spend a bunch of money on a truckful of plants, plant them, and then refuse to ever touch them again because I'm terrified of the frogs hiding in them. That's just not right, on many levels. I think I've found a solution....more on that in a bit.
General health update is, I have a horrible headache, I feel like I'm going to barf, and of course, once again, I have diarrhea. However, my weight has somehow managed to suddenly bounce back up about 10 lbs from where I was a few weeks ago, which is bizarre, because I don't eat, I barf a lot, and I have diarrhea a lot. Figure that out. Well, I see either Dr. Mazj or Roni (the PA) tomorrow for my 1 month post-chemo checkup, so we'll see what's what. I see the radiation oncologist Thursday, and back to the dentist Friday.
I saw the dentist yesterday to take a look at my mess of a mouth and get me started on some treatment. I think I have found heaven. Dr. Mazj referred me to the dental clinic over at the Feather River Hospital giant clinic center, which takes MediCal. Since I have dental damage along with all my other damage from chemo, it's covered by my BCCTP plan. Now, apparently, other clinics who work with MediCal have to get permission from MediCal to do certain things dentally, and are highly restricted on what they can do. Apparently, this clinic, because they have special status as a "rural health clinic" have some sort of federal mandate and according to the dental assistant, they don't have to ask MediCal for permission; they just do what they need to and it gets covered. Ok....I'm good with that....
Yesterday, I got a very thorough exam, and a treatment plan was worked up for all my future dental work. It appears I will be once again spending a lot of time in Paradise. It appears that we will be doing major work to almost every single tooth in my mouth, including partial denture plates, crowns, bridges, fillings, root canals and god knows what else. It also appears, from what the treatment plan I signed said, that the cost to me on this will be $0.00. Well, that's what it said. I am, of course, waiting to hear the "but..." in this situation, but that's what it said.
I am simultaneously exhilarated and scared they'll suddenly hit me with the "but..." If they don't, I would be happy to spend 2 or 3 days a week in Paradise at the dental clinic. The one drawback they have is that MediCal restricts them to doing no more than one procedure at a time, so I can't go and get 2 or 3 fillings at once, that would take 2 or 3 visits, but I can live with that. It's worth it. The dental clinic is also so high-tech, state of the art GORGEOUS that I love it.
SO, Friday I will get the infected back left molar extracted. Next, we'll be extracting the back right molar, which is threatening to get infected. Both of these are really only a piece of molar, since they were broken to start with, and since chemo, chunks have been cracking off of them. After that, who knows what next. I told the dentist, I will just show up and sit down and be quiet, and they can do whatever they need to do. I will drive to Paradise for the next two years if that's what needs to be done.
I think that covers the updates....now for the conundrum.
This will undoubtedly sound exceptionally stupid, but the dilemma (boiled down to its simplest components) is trying to figure out how to get all healed, recovered, "better," or whatever you want to call it.
Now, what I really want is a doctor to tell me to get up each morning and do A, B & C for 34 days and then do X, Y & Z for 63 days and then I will be all better. Lacking that, I need to figure it out for myself and I need input from others. Extra brains!
See, the problem is, I am supposed to rest and recuperate. But how much? For how many hours each day? I am supposed to get a little exercise. How much, how often, and how do I gradually ramp it up? (I have to ask the doc if I'm cleared to start yoga classes.) I need to figure out how to get past the guilt trips where I feel like I'm supposed to be doing something productive every minute of the day. But, I need to do something productive sometimes...right?
When you get sick, you get a treatment plan. Now I need the opposite of that. I need a recuperation plan. I have to do enough resting and recovering so that I actually get well, and I'm not sure how to go about that, or how often I should get up and out of the house and pretend to be a normal person without wearing myself out way, way too much and setting myself back.
So, input is needed. Please!!! Email me or comment here, I'm really interested in what everyone thinks I should try to do.
Today, I think I'm going to test out my gardening solution. That will be my "active" part of the day. I'm going to attempt to get my gardening fix from houseplants, and attempting to make a terrarium. I have vague, very faint memories of having one with Mom when I was a kid at one point. Or am I imagining that? But, it seems like a good idea. I can have the whole "fussing" thing that's kind of like spending time out making a garden (and I can do it outside when the weather cooperates) and make little houseplant terrariums. I saw an article in Real Simple magazine and got hooked. I've always like planting in odd containers, so this appeals to me. I guess we'll see if it satisfies my spring fever urges.
The things I am going to do outside this year are simple. We've decided we have to forgo the finch feeders this season, because the seed price has about quadrupled, and we just can't afford it. So, I'm going to just rake up the rock in that corner and plant a ton of sunflowers all over the place. Gorgeous flowers; eventual bird food! I've also got a really pretty trellis that had morning glory until the freeze killed it, so I'm going to clean that off, and plant some nasturtium seeds beneath it and see what happens. Nasturtium seeds tend to grow in what seems like air sometimes, so I should have to do too much work to rough up the ground under the rock for that. Both of those are plant it and leave it kind of projects, so no frog guilt!
Ok...I think I have updated all that needed to be updated, and rambled enough for one day. Please send input!!! I'm off to eat something squooshy and horribly bad for me.
5 comments:
I have some ideas about the exercise/recovery ratio, but I want to consult with some experts of my own first. I will email you about that.
There are a ton of flowers that attract and feed birds, many of which are low/no maintenance. I will do a little digging about those too, but the first one that pops to mind are cosmos. They self seed and finches and goldfinches love the seeds. A packet or two of seeds is dirt cheap.
I will get back to you on the rest.
Love you
Mom
Firstly, what a relief regarding the dental work!
My thoughts on recovery and strength building...
If you can get outside (backyard/park etc), do so as often as you can. There's so much to be said (good things) about ample indirect UV exposure and Vit D from the sun etc. So, even if you are tired, sit outside in the shade and breathe in the Earth. It will hopefully also help you rest once you finally do get inside.
Gardening will be the perfect excercise for you...most likely because you can do some of this sitting down and still using your upper body muscles.
In my opinion, there is no ratio but your personal guage of when you should rest. Though it seems you are like me, and like to push the envelope a little :). Just promise me that you won't be uprooting any trees ;)
What I have told all my patients are: listen to yourself, go outside, keep your hands busy, drink and eat (though I know this is difficult).
Hugs to you, and here's to Spring :)
I think more often than not you just need to listen to your body.Don't push it much farther than it wants to go and in time it will want to go farther. Get lots of rest and lots of springtime, it is very healing to your spirit!
I don't know if you have already tried this, but is there a support group that you know of or that Feather River can put you on to where you can get some advice from people who have had to deal with the same questions?
My advice to you (and I imagine you should take this with a grain of salt, after all it is ME dispensing advice) is to do anything that makes YOU happy. I say this, building on something my boss said to me, the week before they laid him off (thankfully the rest of us in his dept. have survived to fight on another day). I won't get into the context of the conversation here but he said '...it is amazing all the things we do to ourselves that cause us pain'. So I say that you should strive for the opposite, do only what makes you happy. I've always found the battle to be 'happy' is all in one's head, so if you feel happy you ARE happy and I'm hoping this helps you feel better AND most importantly recover...and if that doesn't help, go back to sleep, that always works for me ;-)
How can you not think frogs are super cutez? You could never go to half my apartment in Oakland. My roomate has lizards, 4 tarantulas from different parts of the world, a rat, snakes, geckos, and even a box of giant hissing cock roaches. She kind of reminds me of you back in the day but to a greater extreme. - brother
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